If you give a drone a Tuesday…

If you give a temporarily teleworking office drone a Tuesday,

She’s going to want to look reasonably unlike a swamp witch for her 4pm video call.

And if she is going to look unlike a swamp witch, she’s going to want to shower.

But before she showers, she’s going to want to do some yoga.

If you give her a gap between meetings for yoga, someone will knock at that time to repair the door.

If she waits to do yoga until he has repaired the door, someone will ask her for a lunchtime meeting.

If she pushes back the lunchtime meeting so she can squeeze the yoga in, she’s going to need some tea.

To make the tea, she’ll need to boil some water.

If she’s boiling water, she’ll make a salad while the kettle goes.

If she makes a salad, she will open the crisper drawer and discover that it’s all full of little tiny bits of broccoli florets.

If she discovers the broccoli florets, she’s going to empty the crisper drawer to clean it out with a damp rag.

If she empties the crisper drawer, she will need to rearrange the contents of the fridge.

If she rearranges the contents of the fridge, she will begin to plan what to make for dinner.

If she contemplates what to make for dinner, she will recall that she is mid-salad preparation.

If she recalls her salad preparation, she will remember that the water has long since boiled.

If she makes the tea, she will realize her meeting will begin in one minute.

If she is almost late to her meeting, she has not prepared for her meeting.

If she has not prepared, she will shrug and decide to sit outside on the deck for the meeting.

If she sits outside on the deck, she will be tempted to yell “Free range compost!” and throw the teabag into the bushes.

If she throws the teabag into the bushes, she will spend several minutes of her meeting distracted, wondering if her dubiously legal composting method was caught on CCTV.

If she’s fretting about surveillance, she will have the idea to write this blog post.

If she’s taking down her ideas for this blog post, she will realize that her laptop does not connect to the remote server very well on the deck.

If she reconnects to the server, she will become irritated that this coworker is asking for a status update on this rather urgent project.

I mean, she’ll say, Kevin, come on, I’m pretty slammed here, dude.

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